How long does it take to get over an ex?
I think we’ve all asked ourselves this question—or, let’s be real: googled this question—at one point in our lives.
And while we all know getting over someone isn’t easy, what about getting over someplace? That place you visited and instantly fell head over heels for; that place you feel homesick for even though you never called it home; or that place you lived for years and still think about all the time.
As I was staring at yet another photo of Edinburgh on Instagram the other day, feeling like I was about to weep because I miss it so fiercely, it dawned on me: Edinburgh is kind of like my ex.
Hear me out: the city consumes my thoughts more than it probably should. I think back to my life there through the lens of some majorly rose-coloured glasses. I can’t stop scrolling through photos of it on social media.
After living there for 2.5 years and having to leave before I made peace with that fact, I wondered so many times: how long is it going to take me to get over this city?
As if I haven’t blathered on about my love for Edinburgh enough, I’m about to take my borderline obsessiveness with Scotland’s too-pretty-to-be-real capital to a
creepy new level.
Here are 13 reasons why Edinburgh is basically my ex.
1. I stare longingly at photos of it
…and then I get that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach where I feel like I’m about to burst into tears because I miss it so much. Every. Damn. Time.
2. I get jealous when other people visit
HOW DARE they visit *my* city. And so soon after I’ve left, too. Ugh.
3. I stalk it on Instagram
This is Edinburgh, VisitScotland, IgersEdinburgh—I follow several accounts. And I check them regularly so I know exactly what’s going on in Edinburgh at all times. Yes, it feels like torture every time I look at these photos, but I keep doing it anyway.
4. I stalk the city in other ways, too
Sometimes, I go onto Google Maps and click the Street View function so I can virtually “walk” past some of my favourite places in Edinburgh: Cockburn Street, The Outsider, Leith, my go-to bus stop on Princes Street across from the castle… the list goes on.
(Side note: PLEASE tell me this isn’t completely insane and other people do this when they miss a place, too?!)
5. I compare every place I visit to Edinburgh
I mean, Barcelona was nice but it’s certainly no Edinburgh.
6. I reminisce about the moments we shared
The first time I climbed Arthur’s Seat; the first (and only) morning I watched the sunrise over the Royal Mile after a big night out; the first time I experienced the madness that is the Fringe Festival… sigh. So many firsts.
7. I travel to other places in hopes of forgetting Edinburgh
Edinburgh won’t even cross my mind when I’m somewhere like the Galapagos Islands!
8. I think about going back all the time
But realistically, I know everything worked out the way it did for a reason.
9. I get nostalgic when I see photos of the city
A picture of Calton Hill? Oh, that’s one of the places I went on my first-ever visit!
A photo of the Grassmarket? I had so many ridiculous nights out there!
A picture of Hogmanay celebrations? That reminds me of the time I celebrated New Year’s Eve in the streets of Edinburgh!
10. I wonder what my life would have been like had I stayed in Edinburgh
Would I still be working at the same job? What neighbourhood would I be living in? Would I still love it as much as I did when I was living there?
11. I have to awkwardly explain why things didn’t work out between us
Weren’t you living in Scotland? What made you decide to come back to Canada?
Why, yes I was, and thank you kindly for bringing this up AGAIN. I’d love to tell you all about how I planned to stay in Edinburgh for at least a few more years but then ran into several visa complications, had to leave against my will, and return home to essentially start my life over from scratch. Any other questions?
12. I can’t listen to songs that remind me of it
I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles), The Bonnie Banks o’ Loch Lomond, Caledonia—don’t you dare play any of these songs in my presence.
13. I keep going back
I don’t care if it prolongs the process of moving on—I will keep going back to Edinburgh. (I may or may not be looking at flight prices right now.)
Do you feel this way about any place? Or have I just reached peak levels of lunacy?
Keen to read more of my Edinburgh ramblings? Excellent! Here are a few you might like: